Well, Monday morning. I'm like one of the clients. Faced with so much, always its hard to know where to start. It may not be initially satisfying or easy, but it does seem, that starting from where you are, matches how the complex is designed to deal in reality. This was the great cry from the Hippies, 'Be In The Now'. Yet, this is one of the hardest things for us Humans to do.
So, this morning, I'm feeling a bit muggy, and a background sense of loose ends, that until I have completed them, will act as a niggling irritating noise. Really, right now, I have to say thank you to that internal Barometer (however you want to describe it)built into ourselves, that lets us know if things are right or not. Suddenly I fill better, and more clearer. Why, is it that the more definition we give and have about what is going on with ourselves, the more understanding we have? Its like a experience is a box of bits, and the more sense and admittance we have about all the bits, rather than just be effected by them, the closer we get to the edge of that box. In other words, to move on in our lives, means we have to move beyond and outside of the box(history) otherwise all we have is continual repetition in our lives. For example, experience without the learning, is like the difference between a tourist and traveller. A tourist is left with holiday snaps, but nothing really changes, while the traveller has a more intimate experience with their surroundings, which invites new learning! This reminds me of my early experiences in Counselling, when I did a 2 year placement in Alcoholic & Substance Abuse Clinic. The clients on the surface seemed to be aware and honest about their substance abuse history, but didn't really move beyond the facts, so just stayed within their box(history) and didn't take any responsibility, so depriving themselves of any new learning or change. In other words, their psychology which didn't want the uncomfortability of change, kept things the way they were. Being just a Trainee Counsellor, I didn't appreciate this, but also admit, that I was also afraid of challenging them to much, and convinced myself, that because the clients seemed to be honest, then the sessions were useful! It was just outside to outside, with no real intimacy. Talk about the clients denial, there was also my own! But that was years ago. I now realise that as a Counsellor I am very much part of the process, and If I cant be real and genuine, how can I expect the client? That if I shy away from uncomfortability, how can I expect the client to step into anything challenging? A reminder for me today then, be myself. Thankyou